My kind understanding neighbour - the lady from Haryana

It is when faced with the bad and the ugly that one remembers the good. 

 

We were living in 338, Defence Services Officers Enclave Part II, Dhaula Kuan New Delhi. My daughter Nandita had then just become very unwell. The psychiatrist at the Military Hospital had started her treatment with an anti-psychotic. He told us that there would be side-effects and to bring her to the hospital when the side-effects started. When the side-effects started I wrapped my daughter in a shawl and blanket and we took her to the hospital where she was given an injection. We brought her back home in the early hours of the morning. 

At noon my neighbor whom I did not know at all came carrying a tray with a hot meal. She said that she had tried out something new and wanted me to taste it. I thanked her. A few days later when I dropped by at her place to return the dishes, she discreetly asked me,'Beti ki tabiyaat theek nahin hai?' I just nodded. She never mentioned the topic again whenever we met. She brought her mother and grandmother several times to our house in the mornings when they were visiting her. The mother and the grandmother wore colourful pleated skirts (ghagras) and buttoned raw cotton kurtas. They used to bring Doda barfi made in pure ghee for my daughter. That was when I got to know that she was from Haryana and that her husband was a JAG officer in the Indian Army.

Some reflections on the 1971 War by a daughter

1. Jawans of the parabrigade being dropped in Dacca by Indian Air Force planes from Central Air Command Allahabad

From a newspaper dated 18 December 1971-

2. Transport planes used as bombers... 
A newspaper report dated 7 December 1971- 

3. The dashing Lieutenant General (Unni ) Candeth from Kerala who was the General Officer Commander –in- Chief Western Command during the 1971 War.

A newspaper report dated December 1971- 

4. The courageous Air Chief Marshal PC Lal, Padma Vibhushan, Padma Bhushan, DFC

and his wife Mrs Ela Lal - both so inspiring, caring, compassionate… made sincere efforts to those impacted by the 1971 war and their families.

A message by Air Chief Marshal PC Lal from Air Head Quarters, New Delhi dated 24 December, 1971 -

The genesis of blaming families impacted by mental illness in India

...through a tome which lay in the website of the Ministry of Health and Family Welfare, Government of India for several years . One could access this tome when one clicked on a link titled 'National Mental Health Programme'

The cover of the tome bore the title,‘Mental Health An Indian Perspective 1946-2003 ‘ by Directorate General of Health Services Ministry of Health and Family Welfare New Delhi.

This tome has a Chapter I ‘Mental Health 2003: The Indian Scene’

Beginning rather theatrically with a quote from A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens ‘It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the seasons of light, it was the seasons of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair,...’

This quote was followed by the writ,'It all began with a fire…’

Referring to the fire that broke out at a private centre, in a place called Erawady where several people with mental illness who were chained, were charred to death. The writers use the word ‘asylum' for a private centre as if the Indian Lunacy ACT 1912 was still in existence at the time of the fire when it was not.

One of the reasons stated by the writers for impacted families leaving their family members in the private centre at Erawady was that ‘stigma and superstitions associated with mental disorders coupled with unwillingness or inability of families to care for their mentally ill relatives appear to be the main contributory factors.’

What was left out (as if the writers were unaware) was that ‘Public mental health education’ was not taking place when it was one of the Plans of action in the National Mental Health Programme. 

For many in India, reading this chapter whilst giving supportive care to their loved ones with mental illness trying their best to keep despair out of their lives its ...a Chapter I ...of incredulous excuses. 


Reference:‘Mental Health An Indian Perspective 1946-2003'  by Directorate General of Health Services. Ministry of Health and Family Welfare New Delhi.